Grass Valley, CA – In an age where smartphones reign supreme and eyes are locked on screens, a unique chiropractor is making waves in Grass Valley. Meet Dr. Al Capopped, a chiropractic maverick specializing in a modern malady: the ‘Tech Neck,’ where people’s necks and heads are perpetually angled downwards, hostages to their handheld devices.

“It’s a modern-day curse,” says Dr. Capopped as he adjusts a patient’s neck. “Our ancestors looked to the stars; we’re just looking at screens. I’m here to rectify that—vertebra by vertebra.”

His clinic is a haven for the tech-obsessed and posture-challenged. Patients like Harry Balzac and Anita Mann, both confessed phone addicts, have found solace and relief under Dr. Capopped’s care.

“I knew I needed help when I texted ‘LOL’ in response to a face-to-face joke,” admits Harry, nursing a sore neck. “Dr. Capopped is helping me rediscover the horizon.”

Yet, not everyone in town is convinced. A group of local teens, eyes fixated on their latest social media feeds, dismiss the notion. “Tech Neck? More like a stiff-necked approach to progress,” scoffs one, her thumbs a blur over her smartphone keyboard.

Where Heads Bow to Screens: Dr. Al Capopped's Whimsical Clinic Offers a Comedic Cure to Grass Valley's 'Tech Neck' Sufferers
Where Heads Bow to Screens: Dr. Al Capopped’s Whimsical Clinic Offers a Comedic Cure to Grass Valley’s ‘Tech Neck’ Sufferers

Amid his bustling clinic, Dr. Al Capopped shared details of his unorthodox and patented technique for correcting Tech Neck, which raises eyebrows and heads.

“It’s a three-part process,” he explains, with a mischievous glint in his eye. “First, I have my patients text their last goodbye to their phones. It’s a ceremonial parting, which sets the mood. Then, we move to the ‘Neck-o-Matic’—a contraption I devised that gently bops the head upwards whenever they instinctively look down. Think of it as a tech-savvy cuckoo clock. For the finale, I perform a synchronized dance routine with the patient, set to the tune of vintage dial-up internet sounds. The rhythm is crucial for spinal alignment.”

Patients like Anita Mann swear by the technique, though she admits, “It’s bizarre. I never thought I’d tango to the screeches of dial-up as part of my chiropractic treatment, but here we are!”

Dr. Capopped’s methods, while unconventional, highlight a whimsical and earnest effort to combat a very modern problem.

Dr. Capopped, undeterred, continues his mission with a blend of humor and healing.

“They say laughter is the best medicine, but when it comes to Tech Neck, a good old-fashioned neck crack does wonders, too.”

In a world where downward gazes are the norm, Dr. Capopped stands as a reminder: sometimes, you must look back to look forward.