Weird

Grass Valley's Mill Street transformation ignites a battle between progressive city officials and conservative residents, who see the pedestrian walkway as a symbol of "wokeness" and liberal agendas. The city now faces the challenge of balancing modernization with preserving traditions, while quelling the debate over its direction.

RFK Jr. targets pre-meal chips and salsa in his latest crusade, sparking outrage in Grass Valley. Loretta Splitair hilariously skewers the absurdity while unpacking the broader chaos behind this tortilla-based controversy.

A headline so redundant it hurts: officials confirm a deceased man under Foresthill Bridge was indeed from Santa Rosa. This masterclass in obvious reporting leaves residents bemused and the media's motives questioned.

Grass Valley’s Bud Furbenny, known for his conspiracy-laden videos about roundabouts, Bigfoot, and chemtrails, is suing YouTube after auto-captions turned his name into “Bugs Fuckbunny.” The video went viral not for his theories, but for the unfortunate closed caption error. While Furbenny demands justice, locals laugh and wonder if this mishap was another plot in his wild theories.

In a misguided social media-fueled resurrection attempt, Redding’s Bethel Church youth group unwittingly reanimated Pete “Lazzy T” Trevino, an infamous local killer. Although briefly resurrected, Trevino quickly clarified he’s “still dead” spiritually—and has since been dismissed from various “second-chance” roles, including at a Quickie Mart. Bethel’s youth now plan less dramatic endeavors as Trevino fades back into legend.

Grass Valley’s own Daryl McCracken is recovering from rabies and tularemia after rescuing a squirrel he believes is the target of a government conspiracy. Despite no interest from local authorities, McCracken insists he’s been “targeted” for his activism. Ignoring medical advice and raising a sparse $18, McCracken remains undeterred, vowing to continue his mission to protect Liberty the Squirrel from “the deep state.”

When her latest solo intimacy session didn’t go as planned, Nevada City’s own Mitzy McConnell took to Instagram and Facebook, blaming “deep-seated societal negativity” for her inability to align with her inner goddess. Self-described as a liberated, empowered woman, Mitzy now finds herself locked in a self-imposed purgatory, wondering if the world’s dissonant energies are to blame for her failed transcendence.

Nevada City bar band The Thorny Blackberries sold their entire original song catalog to Sony for $5.34. Known for hauntingly niche tunes like “Highway 49 Blues,” the Crazy Horse Saloon house band sees the deal as validation, even if it only buys them a single drumstick. “We’re corporate now,” says lead singer Zeke.

Jory Trebilcock of Rhode Island Street insists he's the great-grandson of "Propeller Guy," the man flung by the Titanic’s propeller. With no evidence, he’s convinced Grass Valley to host "Propeller Day," complete with Bigfoot theories, inflatable trampolines, and a Captain’s Hat Toss. Meanwhile, Nevada City scoffs—but hey, pasties will be served.