News

Grass Valley naturopath Jerod “Whitehorn” Hoserben remains baffled that Big Pharma hasn’t assassinated him, despite years of conspiracy theories, turmeric smoothies, and YouTube warnings. Locals remain skeptical, but hydrated.

A local Norwegian family from the Cascade Shores housing development is in hot water for attempting to cremate a deceased relative on Scotts Flat Lake earlier today. The Barstad family recently lost their patriarch, Norman Barstad, who had lived with them at their Spanish Lane home.

White Lotus is filming in Nevada City, and the town’s vortexes, Viking funerals, and rogue mayors might be too real for HBO. Walton Goggins is back. Possibly as a ghost. Definitely with a wrench.

The Department of Justice has launched an investigation into Broad Street Beacon editor Randall Finkelstein, following Trump’s accusation of treason over satirical commentary. Nevada City’s resident rabble-rouser now faces federal scrutiny for exercising free speech with too much flair—and too little deference.

A California man was deported after allegedly replacing a high-flow showerhead with a low-flow model in a Texas Airbnb, violating the American Freedom of Flow Act. The bizarre incident, now a satirical flashpoint in the culture wars, has sparked outrage, memes, and congressional hearings under "Operation Dripgate."

Chase Bank's new AI-powered ATM that asks for tips from customers has sparked controversy in Grass Valley, California. While some are ecstatic about the new option, others are uncomfortable with tipping a machine. This move by the bank has left customers wondering whether it's an attempt to provide better service or just another way to cash in on them.

Millions of Americans receive mysterious “DOGE Checks” ahead of Tax Day. IRS uncertain if these crypto dividends are taxable income, recommending taxpayers practice “vigilant gratitude” amid widespread confusion and algorithm-driven disparities in distribution.

Elon Musk’s Department of Government Efficiency mistakenly sends DOGE refunds to Nevada City progressives, sparking outrage among MAGA voters and fueling a satirical crypto culture war featuring TRUMPYCOIN and meme-fueled government chaos.

Grass Valley, CA -- In what is shaping up to be the most explosive exposé since the Great Patchouli Shortage of 2016, the Broad...